Mrs. Cronin
Bell 4
5/5/14
When They Created a Teacher's Occupation:
In the style of: Erma Bombeck
After the unfortunate caveman years, when humans began to realize that there was more to life than disease and death, we began forming a new type of person to society. This brand of human being was named teacher. Its purpose was to bring up the youth from an academic standpoint, and mold them to become contributive members of society.
The king at the time called on his servants, and had them search the land for everyone that valued knowledge.
When all of those people were gathered the king explained, "Your new duty is to help the children learn. Teach them everything you know about the world. You must use every book you've read, every math problem you've faced, and every historical encounter to stop this disease and death. We must allow this world to prosper!"
At that moment the queen came forward and further noted, "There arer a few things that you will need to accomplish this duty:
- You must be completely fait to every student, no matter what excuse they bring forward;
- You must have two eyes on every side of your head in order to view the classroom from all angles;
- You must stay out of all personal affairs. Do not speak of your children, your spouse, or anything as such. This is a strictly professional business;
- You must have decent organizational skill and have legible handwriting;
- And finally, you must stay hard as stone. Don't let the children get to know you. They don't care about you. You shouldn't care about them. Reamin numb to all emotion during your hours of work."
At this the king and queen went away and discussed. "How could a teacher remain fair, and still restrict from allowing any emotion?" asked the king, "What if he is so frustrated that he must react?" At this the queen replied, "That is just the occupation of teaching my dear. That is why it has never been done before. It is extremely difficult. If we atke the knowledge lovers apart and ingrain these abilities inside of them, than this problem would be solved."
The king nodded his head in agreement and smiled, "We shall take those who value knowledge to the artist. He will surely know how to put these abilities inside of our future teachers."
the servant standing nearby, who was most definitely eavesdropping just couldn't hold back anymore. "Your majesty," he began, "I beg your pardon, but I just feel that a teacher should indeed be fair, but shouldn't they also care about their students and get to know them? I know that if I were to be taught by someone I would most definitely want to learn from someone that I knew something about. Heck, if we got to know each other maybe they could learn something from me!"
The king was very quickly infuriated. "I know what I'm doing, and I know what i want! I am the king and you are the servant! I am above you! that is exactly how i want the situation to be between the teacher and the students. One should clearly be above the other. And we all know students can't rule above their teachers!"
And with that the servant was sent away, never to be seen again. And the knowledge lovers were sent to the artist.
The artist was very skilled indeed, and he could do exactly what the king wanted him to do. And that is exactly what he tried to do. However, after every teacher was completely formed, the artist's elbow slipped. He knocked over the jar of love and caring, which spilled into a few of the teachers hardened hearts. He heard the crackling of the outer, blackened shell, which soon was to be no more.
The artist couldn't face the king this way, and he knew that this accident would have to remain a secret. He whispered into each of the ears, whose hearts had been un-hardened and told them that they must hide their love and care from the king.
The next year, when the very first school year began, every single teacher that had been created succesfully taught their students. The most beloved and highest paid teachers however, were the ones whose hearts had been un-hardened. The students in their classes got the best grades, and learned the most. The king was very wrong. the students cared very much for the teachers, and that care was very much returned. Just like how the students weren't the only ones caring, they also weren't the only ones learning. The loving teachers learned, maybe even more than their students did.
When all of those people were gathered the king explained, "Your new duty is to help the children learn. Teach them everything you know about the world. You must use every book you've read, every math problem you've faced, and every historical encounter to stop this disease and death. We must allow this world to prosper!"
At that moment the queen came forward and further noted, "There arer a few things that you will need to accomplish this duty:
- You must be completely fait to every student, no matter what excuse they bring forward;
- You must have two eyes on every side of your head in order to view the classroom from all angles;
- You must stay out of all personal affairs. Do not speak of your children, your spouse, or anything as such. This is a strictly professional business;
- You must have decent organizational skill and have legible handwriting;
- And finally, you must stay hard as stone. Don't let the children get to know you. They don't care about you. You shouldn't care about them. Reamin numb to all emotion during your hours of work."
At this the king and queen went away and discussed. "How could a teacher remain fair, and still restrict from allowing any emotion?" asked the king, "What if he is so frustrated that he must react?" At this the queen replied, "That is just the occupation of teaching my dear. That is why it has never been done before. It is extremely difficult. If we atke the knowledge lovers apart and ingrain these abilities inside of them, than this problem would be solved."
The king nodded his head in agreement and smiled, "We shall take those who value knowledge to the artist. He will surely know how to put these abilities inside of our future teachers."
the servant standing nearby, who was most definitely eavesdropping just couldn't hold back anymore. "Your majesty," he began, "I beg your pardon, but I just feel that a teacher should indeed be fair, but shouldn't they also care about their students and get to know them? I know that if I were to be taught by someone I would most definitely want to learn from someone that I knew something about. Heck, if we got to know each other maybe they could learn something from me!"
The king was very quickly infuriated. "I know what I'm doing, and I know what i want! I am the king and you are the servant! I am above you! that is exactly how i want the situation to be between the teacher and the students. One should clearly be above the other. And we all know students can't rule above their teachers!"
And with that the servant was sent away, never to be seen again. And the knowledge lovers were sent to the artist.
The artist was very skilled indeed, and he could do exactly what the king wanted him to do. And that is exactly what he tried to do. However, after every teacher was completely formed, the artist's elbow slipped. He knocked over the jar of love and caring, which spilled into a few of the teachers hardened hearts. He heard the crackling of the outer, blackened shell, which soon was to be no more.
The artist couldn't face the king this way, and he knew that this accident would have to remain a secret. He whispered into each of the ears, whose hearts had been un-hardened and told them that they must hide their love and care from the king.
The next year, when the very first school year began, every single teacher that had been created succesfully taught their students. The most beloved and highest paid teachers however, were the ones whose hearts had been un-hardened. The students in their classes got the best grades, and learned the most. The king was very wrong. the students cared very much for the teachers, and that care was very much returned. Just like how the students weren't the only ones caring, they also weren't the only ones learning. The loving teachers learned, maybe even more than their students did.
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